Memories of a Player

 Every now and then, I tell my nieces about what my life was like in my 20s.

The late 90s and the early 2Ks was a whole vibe.
If you were there, then you know that a time was had.
A while back, I was listening to a song entitled, " Before Da Kappa 2K1" , and I was transported instantly in time.
The Kappa Beach Party's of Galveston, Tx in the early 2Ks was definitely an experience.
It was a time that came and went.
I am so thankful for the grace that God has given me to square up and make corrections for foolish behavior of the past.
Some of my friends from that era did not make it to see today.
As the old saying goes, when you know better, you should do better!
I don't mind telling my stories, because I had to through trial era to get to the blessings that God has in store for me.
Always remember that if He can bring you through it, He can bring you to it!

A gift for a Princess

On May 6th, 2026, I spoke with my niece and she told me something that I had been waiting to hear for a long time.

She told me that she finally wore the earrings that I purchased from Zales to prom.

I was not there to witness this event, but knowing that she wore them set my mind at ease.

Prior to tonight, she had never even heard of Zales.

I made her look it up.

Once she saw the price of those earrings, she couldn't stop screaming through the phone.

Years ago, I saved money to purchase a necklace and a pair of earrings to give my nieces to wear for prom.

I gave the 2ct. tennis necklace to her sister, and I gave her the 2 ct. earrings.

I gave each of them this gift to show them how much I love and value them as the princesses of our family.

I am sharing my story with you all to show that there is no limit of love that I have for the members of my family.

And now, they know it as well!

My favorite Nightclub in the late 90s

 Recently, Bun B of UGK spoke about his performance in the late 90s at PJ's Disco of Pine Bluff, Arkansas.

When I was in my early 20s, I considered myself to be a dance hall king.

I traveled all over the state of Arkansas to attend whatever the hottest nightclub was at the time.

PJs Disco was my favorite spot, because the atmosphere made you feel like you were somebody as soon as you walked in the door!

This place had it all! It had a lit up dance floor, a swimming pool, and a billiard room. I am sure that a place like this would cost millions of dollars to build today.

Despite the apparent danger of this place, I still managed to go there numerous times. because I felt invincible!

My aunts talked about this place when they were younger, and I could not wait to go there as soon as I turned 21.

Sadly, due to a 2013 city ordinance to close nightclubs around 1 a.m. , Perry Johnson, the owner, made the decision to close its doors.

Three years later, Mr. Johnson died at the age of 70.

If those walls could talk, imagine the stories they would tell about the people who came there.

RIP Perry Johnson!

Thanks for making my 20s memorable!

Growing up with no WiFi in my old neighborhood

 Kids today will never understand the joy of growing up without WiFi in the hood.

When I was a kid, it was nothing to see a street that was dominated by Huffy Bikes, Big Wheels, and Power Wheels.

One of the coolest things that I ever saw were the teenagers who could ride a Wheel- E, on a Schwinn 10- Speed bike, for a BLOCK!

The kids with cars would be blasting the latest music on their Alpine or Kenwood radios.

My grandfather's house was were all of the neighborhood kids would come to get their bikes fixed.

Even my current pastor was on those people.

Fast forward 30 plus years later, the same the neighborhood is now is quite than it has ever been.

The basketball court that was once densely populated on the weekend is now vacant year round.

We used to beg our parents to go outside to play.

Now our children and grandchildren run up our electric bills by playing Xboxes and Playstations.

My how time flies!

Tears and a Smile

On November 1st, 1996, I graduated from Marine Corps Recruit Depot (MCRD) San Diego. 

I was the first person in my family to join the Marines. Everyone else are members of the Army and Navy. 

When I boarded the plane to go home, I was seated next to a beautiful Swedish woman. 

I told her that I was on my way home. 

She told that after spending 5 years with a rich and abusive man, she had finally had enough and she was on her way home as well. 

I asked her if I could trade her my spot for the window seat, and she accepted.  

When the airplane took off, I looked down at the base and I started to cry uncontrollably. 

At the time, I had just spent 3 months of suffering and getting to know men from all corners of the country. I was crying tears of joy and sadness.

The nice lady grabbed my head and held it to her breasts, and said to me, "It's okay. Everything will be alright!"

After I had calmed down and realized the magnitude of what happened, I smiled and replied. " It sure will!"

My only regret from this situation is that I did not get her contact information, because I wonder whatever became of her.  

 

Know your worth!

 On June 6th, 2025, I was asked to have my photos featured in a local art gallery for a month.

On opening night, I visited with several of my closest friends and family members. 

While I was there, I was given the opportunity to sell my work. 

One of the other artists that was there, sold his work for $15.

I was a little bit envious because at the time, I had not sold anything. I must admit that I thought that his work was better than mine.

At the end of the night, I was the last artist who was there before the gallery closed. Right as I had begun to shut things down, a couple walked up to me to ask how much I would sell my photos. I told them that I was selling them for $75. The husband thought that I was going to tell him that I was selling it for $150. So he gave me $100 instead. 

The moral of the story is this:

Just because you may think that someone else's work is better than yours does not mean that it is more valuable. Know your worth and believe in yourself. If you don't believe in yourself no one else will.  

Helping a Neighbor

 A few years back a homeless person walked up to me and asked me for help as I was taking an afternoon stroll in the city of Little Rock.

The first question that I asked him was how he came to be in his state and why he hadn't reached out to his family for help? He told me that he had gotten a job here coming from Tennessee and within a few months after he was here, he was laid off and couldn't recover. He told me that he had lost his house, phone, and everything.

I allowed him to use my cell phone to contact a relative. They told him to go to Western Union to pick up some money for food and for a bus ticket home.

So you know me, I had to see this thing through.

So I helped him with the rest of his task. Before he got on his bus to go home, he asked me for my mailing address. I didn't think anything of it at the time so I gave it to him and I watched as he boarded the bus and left safely.

About 8 months after that encounter with him, I received a letter in the mail with a $100 bill attached to it to thank me for helping him get back to his family.

The moral of this story is this: You should always be nice to someone regardless of their appearance. You just never know. You might be entertaining an angel!

A waste of $10 and time!

After watching a great victory of my college alma mater's football team, I wanted to be where the action would be. So I spoke to this hot chick and I asked them where the celebration party would be.

She told me that everyone was on their way to "The Den". Once I made it there, I showed them my identification and I spent $10 to get in. Once I got in, I got patted down by the security staff. He patted down my leg and then he responded, " What's that?" I said, " I'm black and we come well equipped!" He nodded and slightly pushed me aside to continue with his job.

Once I took a look around the place, I became sick to my stomach. I had never seen so many Double A's in the place in a long time, and I am not talking about batteries. I was thinking, "Whatever happened to the D's?" I was amazed at how young everyone looked. And then it hit me that this was their natural environment. I was the old person in the room! The only thing that the place had to offer was beer and karaoke. 

When I was younger people danced and had a great time until the early morning hours. This ambiance was something that I could not enjoy.

I learned something that night. It's a new day with new players who are playing the same game. The days of long ago are now gone. It's time to get somewhere and sit down.

The Dark- Skinned Lady with a Sunshine Smile

 In the fall of 1998, I became really popular at the college parties. 

Whenever the party started no one would start to dance. I think that it was largely due to the fact that no one wanted to be the first to be seen on the dance floor. 

After being a Marine for 2 years at this point, I felt invincible!

Whenever I wanted to get the party started, I would look for the dark-skinned lady with the sunshine smile. 

Her name was Teneicia. She was much taller than I was, but that never stopped me from asking her to dance. She was just as adventurous as I was at the time and that was all that mattered. 

Most women would not dance with you unless other people were already dancing.

Whenever I grabbed Teneicia, it was like the world stood still.

 A million eyes could have been watching us.

However, it did not matter, because we were in the zone! 

Once we started dancing, the whole room would eventually follow our lead.

She was my dance partner for years until she eventually moved away in the early 2000s.

I did not see her again until around 2016.

Today, she is a successful business owner, a mother of 4, and I am a community servant. 

Sometimes when our paths cross we will smile at one another and share memories about the good old days. We never danced again, but our friendship became stronger than ever over time.

Out of all of the women that I have ever danced with she will always be my favorite dance partner!

See Something, Say Something!

Years ago when I was a car salesman, I noticed that the top salesman was telling off-colored jokes to our co-workers and they were laughing.

Immediately I confronted him by telling him that what he was doing was wrong and that it should not be done in the workplace.

He looked at me and said, " What's the matter, is your wife Mexican or something?"

I said to him that he need to stop right there, because if he is the type of person who would joke about Mexicans, then I know that he would joke about Black people as well.

Weeks later after I confronted him, life was made hard for me to succeed at that job. No one wanted to associate with me for fear that I might confront them like I did the top salesman. 

I soon left there, but at the end of the day, I still feel great for speaking up when I noticed that something was wrong or inappropriate. 

The moral of the story is this:

Always remember that there is never a wrong time to do the right thing. When you notice that something is wrong, SAY SOMETHING!

You just never know who else might have wanted to say something but did not have the courage to do so. 

A Wild Conversation with a Wildcat.

 Anyone who knows me knows that I love "Wildcats" aka Cougars. Well, this one time I was with one who had never done sex outside of a bed in the bedroom. When she came to my place, the moment got wild and I bent her over a barstool. When I had her suspended in mid-air like superman, I was hitting it from the back and her coochie started pooting. She hollers out, "it's talking to ya daddy!" if she hadn't moved out of the state, I'd still be having conversations what that coochie.

Christmas in the J.C. Clemons Sr. Home

 From 1984 to the early 2000s, Christmas was always one of the favorite times of the year for my step-father, J.C. Clemons, Sr.

He would always decorate our home with Christmas lights, and he loved to play Christmas music. Our house was always the best lit up house in the neighborhood. Everything was fine, until the light bill came.

I still remember him playing The Supreme's Christmas album and Gene Autry's Christmas songs every year.

One of the other things that we would receive is a bucket of fruit and nuts. To this day, I have no idea what that had to do with Christmas. 

Sadly, in April of 2010, he died due to a battle with lung cancer.

Whenever I hear those songs played on the radio, I can't help but think about those years when I was a child in his home. 

Fact to Face

During the Fall of 2022, I came face to face with my college crush. 

I had not seen this woman since her sister graduated college in 2005.

I ran into her during our college homecoming weekend. 

Back when I was in college, I thought that she was the zenith of finer womanhood. 

I finally ended up telling my crush that I liked her years ago.

She wondered why I did not speak up back then.

I told her that it was hard to saying anything to her when sleazy women were trying to get to me. 

We both laughed and chunked it up as a missed opportunity.

At the time that I spoke with my crush, she was a married woman of 11 years. The moment that I spent speaking with her was a magical moment in time that I will always cherish.

Sometimes it is just good to get things out in the open even if you know that it will not change things for you.

I'm in the Big Leagues Now!

 This is a story about the first time that I had sex with a tall woman.

It was the summer of the year 2000. 

I met this woman on the website called Blackplanet.com.

I met her in a chat room entitled 21 and up.

Let me begin by saying that in my 20s I was very experimental when it came to sex.

I had no restrictions when it came to women and sex. I just figured that if she was down to do it then so was I.

Anyway, back to the topic. Her name was " Fine as Wine". No one ever used their real names at the time and that was fine with me.

"Fine as Wine" and I began to personal message one another. The topic of sex was intense between us. I could not wait to meet her. So we agreed to meet at a popular motel in my hometown. 

When I met her she was looking sexy as hell, but she had to be at least 6 feet tall in heels!

I stood firmly at 5 foot 4 inches tall. She approached me and looked down at me and she said, " So what's up? Are we going to do this or what?"

I look up at her gigantic size and I said, " Hell yeah! I am up for the challenge!"

It was the best sex that I had ever had at that point in my life, and I have never told anyone about it until now.

This was the start of a discreet fling that lasted for at least 3 years into my first years of college. 

Eventually, we ended up breaking up because she got a job that took her away to Memphis, TN.

Years later, we found each other on Facebook and I found out that she is now happily married with 3 children with a man her own height.

Every now and then I wonder what our lives would have been like if we would have publicly announced our love for one another and not cared about what people would have thought about our mismatched height.

I will always think of her as the giant that got away.

I have since then learned to live my life outside of the prison of other people's thoughts. It is the only way to establish true freedom to do the things that I want to do.

Come Out, Come Out Where ever you are!

 In the year 2000, a friend that I had known from high school told me that he was a homosexual. 

At first, I did not know how to react to his confession.

I had so many questions that raced through my head at the time. However, when it was all said and done, I accepted him and I continued on with things as if he had never said a word to me about it. 

A few weeks later, after his confession, he decided to invite me to join him at this nightclub that he frequented. 

I decided to join him because I was a bit curious and I had never been to a gay nightclub.

The nightclub that we went to was called " Discovery Nightclub". The cover charge was $10.

The atmosphere was unlike anything that I had ever experienced. There were even a bunch of pretty girls in there from wall to wall. I found out later that this was the spot where flocks of pretty women would go to avoid being approached by men. 

Well, that did not always work...... 

In a side room, they had shows where drag queens would perform. The show was hosted by a drag queen character called "Dominique". 

The host spent most of their time announcing the performers and talking bad to pretty women. The whole show was definitely entertaining. 

After the show was over, we made our way over to the dance floor. In a group of girls dancing, I spotted this girl that I had previously danced with at another nightclub. Her name was Ebony. 

I told my friend that I was going to go and dance with her. My friend immediately grabbed me by my shoulder and warned me it may not be a good idea to do it because it could result in a fight.

I told him that I knew her and I would be fine.

Right as I approached Ebony, she grabbed me and pulled me into the center of the huddle of women.

It was there that she gave me a passionate kiss while she lifted me up by my rear end.

My friend saw that and he knew instantly that I was "The Man"! 

After dancing with Ebony, she wrote down her number on a napkin and we hugged and said our goodbyes. 

I started dating someone else a few days later and I never saw or called Ebony again. 

If I am being honest, I was just not into bisexual women at the time. Who am I kidding? I'm still not.

As for me and my friend, we have maintained our 30-plus-year friendship. However, we never went to "Discovery" together ever again. 

Years later, I heard that Discovery Nightclub closed due to the lack of patronage during the global pandemic. 

My friend now has the same boyfriend that he has had for the past 20-plus years. 

And we all lived happily ever after.

 

The Hole In The Wall

 When I was in my early 20s, I used to travel the state of Arkansas to attend any and every popular nightclub.

One of the first places that I attended was a place in the small black rural community of Union Chapel. My stepdad once warned me to be careful going up there because people that he had known in the past had gotten killed there. 

Despite his warnings, my sister Mary Jayne and I went there one night in 1999. In the middle of nowhere, stood this little green building that had cars surrounding it. The cover charge was $10. 

When I entered the building, the place was packed with beautiful women from wall to wall. The atmosphere smelled of whiskey and fried chicken. It was here that I got my introduction to "Mama Lucy". Mama Lucy is a homemade alcoholic drink that was served in that region of the country. I paid $2 for my first drink. I had several cups of it throughout the night because it tasted like a strong version of Kool-Aid.

It was also here that I met and danced with the finest woman in the room. Her name was Nicky. I danced for what seemed like hours with her. At the end of the night, she gave me a nice kiss on the cheek and her phone number that I had written down on a napkin. 

I was so lucky that I had my sister with me because as soon as the night air hit my face, I ended up crawling back to my car. My sister drove us home that evening. I never saw Nicky again and I lost the phone number that she had given me. 

In 2004, I was told that the little green building was raided by the cops and has since then ceased to exist.

Whenever I hear that song called Hole in the Wall playing, I can't help but be reminded of that autumn night in 1999.

Family Jewels

 On January 28th, 2022, my niece D'Mya's 13th birthday,

I received a strange call from the Faulkner County Library. They proceeded to tell me that 2 of my mother's books were there and they wanted to know if I wanted to have them. 

I told them that I did. So I went there to retrieve them. 

What I found was phenomenal. These books were 2 handwritten books of poetry that she had managed to get stored in the library's catalog. By this time, they had been in the system for nearly 28 years! 

The books looked like journals that you would buy from Walmart and they were filled with poetry and pasted pictures of family photos that I had not seen in years!  

When I told my mother that I had retrieved those books, she told me that she wrote those books and she dedicated them to the memory of Mother Jesse Anderson and my great-grandmother who we affectionately called " Mama Gert". 

I wanted to write about this to remind you all of just how important family artifacts are. Never take anything for granted.

I wanted to be cool by wearing a new pair of shoes

 When I was around 14 years old, I begged my mother for a pair of high-top Chuck Taylor Converse basketball shoes. 

My parents were not people that liked to spend money on expensive shoes for me. 

I wanted these shoes because just about everyone that I knew had them.

My mother felt that I did not deserve those shoes because my current shoes at the time were in good condition. Therefore, she felt for me to have those shoes was not a necessity.

I offered to do most of the housework if she would consider getting them for me. 

I delivered on my word. My mother was so impressed by my ambition to win her approval that she went against her normal budgeting regimen and she bought those shoes for me.

I was so excited to get those shoes that I could not wait to wear them. I wore them for about a week before I realized that those shoes were not as cool as everyone made them out to be. 

They had no arch support and they hurt my feet. After much consideration, I threw them in the trash and I never looked back.

After about 8 months or so had gone by my mother finally noticed that I was not wearing the shoes. She said to me, " Boy where are those shoes that you made me spend good money for?" I lied to her by saying," Mom, those shoes were popular and someone stole them!"

Years later, I finally confessed to what I had done and I even gave her some money back to replace what I had convinced her to spend on me. 

I learned a valuable lesson back then. I learned that not everything that is trendy is meant for you to have.

Be careful because it may not live up to its hype. 

Karma has no time limit!

 When I was in my twenties, I was a very popular young man. 

It was at this time that I had truly built up a sexual reputation for myself. I was doing it with any and everyone that wanted me.

Not all of the women that I was involved with were single. 

In fact, while I was in college, a young woman wanted me to be her side-piece. A few months down the line, her boyfriend found out about it and he confronted me. I admitted it and instead of fighting me he just simply broke up with her.

 He was a smart guy. Had we fought, we might have ended up in jail or worse. 

I found out later that before we graduated that he took an internship for Company X. 

And that was the last time that I had heard from him.

Fast forward 18 years later, I went on 4 job interviews for the same company. In the final interview, I met up with him. He was the Senior Human Resources Manager. 

Let's just say that I did not get the job. All that I could do was laugh when it was all said and done because I knew that karma had finally kicked in. 

The moral of this story is this:

Regardless of how much someone wants you, if they belong to someone else, just walk away. It is not worth all of the drama that comes along with that situation. 

A Beautiful Surprise

 On October 10, 2020, I received the greatest gift from my father Johnny Joe Gulley in many years. 

At the age of 43, he decided to host my first birthday party. I did not grow up with my father so this moment was huge! 

Since COVID-19 was still very active at the time, we decided to have the event outside at my cousin Cal's home.

Approximately 20 or so people including children, arrived at random times to help join in the fun. 

Words can't begin to express how loved my family made me feel.

We ate good food and listened to radio station104.5 as we played dominoes.

During the first game, one of them shouted out, " You can't play dominoes. You are just matching colors." I am not going to lie. I was a tad bit hurt by that statement.

Keep in mind that the first few hands that I had were terrible.

Since I was the low man on the board, I had to get up to let someone else play.

In the second game that I played, I sought vengeance. In the end, I emerged victoriously.

I left them being a winner!

We took plenty of pictures to document this event to share with my friends across the globe via the Facebook website. Overall, I had fun and I was proud of my dad for hosting the event for me.

He said that he wanted to continue this tradition for many years to come. 

I pray that God will allow us to share many more birthdays such as this in the years ahead.